Gloabl Warming is False? NOOOO….

Note: Chapter 1 of the Autobiography of a Modern Male will be up in a few days.

No global warming after all (hat tip: Vox). A pity since I, for one, was looking forward to global warming. More temperate winters in most places, more of the arctic circle uncovered, maybe even some of the land under Antarctica once more uncovered.Less shitty weather, more mild days reminiscent of late autumn/eatrly spring…what was not to love?

What would have been the downside of Global Warming? Thew loss of a few pacific islands? More than made up by the increase of habitable land in the Arctic circle. The deserts spreading? Most deserts are shit holes – Africa, the Middle East, Mexico, SoCal – so no major loss there. The middle of Australia becoming an ocean? Who gives a shit its nearly all uninhabitable desert.

All in all I was really looking forward to global warming.

Instead we are more likely to have global cooling. Global cooling will suck. Less warm sunny days, less women walking around barely dressed, more time lost shovelling driveways clear, more Canadians fleeing into America.

What is with the hysteria of cooling (it was big in the 70s) then warming?

The simple fact is people think the world never changes.

The truth is the world is always changing. People just can’t see beyond their own short lives and for them today is the same as yesterday and tomorrow will be the same, so on until they die. It was only in the 1970s that scientists realized the world was changing and this, a priori, had to be a bad thing.

The climate was changing because people are bad. They had pissed off nature through their actions. Two thousand years ago people believed Volcanoes were angry gods who were pissed at the people. Just as the ancients appeased the volcano gods we moderns appease the climate change gods.

Yet the world see saws between cold periods and hot periods. The last ice age peaked 20,000 years ago and officially ended 10,000 years ago. What causes ice ages? Volcanoic activity? Solar activity? human activity? manbearpig? cow farts? the influence of distant stars as the solar system travels through the galactic plane on its 200 million year trip around the centre of the milk way?

I don’t know. All I know is the world changes. It always has and it probably always will (unless mankind works out how to completely geo engineer the world or the Universe dies of steady state).

Most people are grasshoppers and the fear of the status quo changing terrifies them. Humans may be great at adapting (supposedly our evolutionary advantage) but most are poor at thinking ahead and forward planning. The few who do plan ahead for a coming ice age with their well stocked bunkers are labelled nuts.

My best guess, by the way, is that we will have a period of cooling preceded by a cataclysmic event (volcanic eruption, solar flare, magnetic pole reversal etc) – all of which has happened more than once in the past.

Conspiracy Note: A post like this wouldn’t be complete without the requisite conspiracy theory (since by mentioning anything other than AGW I am a crack pot)  – Global cooling was the big threat in the 70s but why did everyone start freaking out over AGW? Maybe the elites wanted the sheeple to die en masse (what better way to achieve the UN mandated 500,000,000 global population) so they encouraged AGW hysteria will building themselves bunkers and storing supplies for coming ice age…

Don’t forget to check back in a few days to read Chapter 1 of the Autobiography of a Modern Male.

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